Tuesday, August 07, 2007

Can we help this daughter of an older dad?

Today I got an anonymous response to a post I made in May, and since that post is kind of buried, I thought I would go ahead and make a new post out of it - here goes:

Is there a support group for children of older fathers? I'm the eldest child of a start-over-dad and have to make some tough decisions that none of my friends have made, and won't make until they are twice my age, and settled. I need some advice, on how I can take care of my aging father, without stopping my life. (I'm 27, single, and have recently started my career, and very fast feel as though I'm going to have four dependants.) I am also afraid that I don't have much time left with my father. Does anyone know where I can get some support?

You've raised an important topic here - caring for older parents when they get really older. I'm facing that now. My mother is 86, and has enjoyed remarkably good health until very recently, as her gait has become unsteady and she has shown some of the other signs of aging that she has been able to keep at bay until now. Of her five children I - the youngest - live the closest to her, so I'm often running her to the doctor, or taking her to her swimming class, or otherwise just helping her navigate the world. I don't consider it a burden, it's in a way an honor to repay for all the work she did in raising me. But it does take some balancing with two kids at home.

That said, I don't know of any sources specifically for people like us, whose parents are getting older just as we face our own milestones. I don't know where you live, but if it's local to us here in Forsyth County, NC, I can tell you from experience that Senior Services is amazingly helpful.

I hope you find the help you're looking for, and if you find any support groups please let us now and I will certainly post again.

Anyone else know of any groups or have any suggestions?

2 comments:

Anonymous said...

try to find a social worker ,or go to local senior center most towns have them,behind the desk ask if someone there is a social worker in the office.
Also In the phone book look up the word nure,ther you'll find agencies that offer services such as home health aids that come to house to help care for give bath,do household chores,help give medication,make meals,take on errands,take person out ,do physical therapy in home or just provide companioship for a few hours ,the services offered will take all the responsibility for everything off your shoulders providing the help and services you and he can use.dont be afraid to call more than just one to see what they can offer you.You and he will be just fine ,you already know to ask for help.That will bring you one step closer to getting it on your journey through life always remember that.Be well and take the time for yourself to smile.

Anonymous said...

lol that word to look up in phonebook is nurse not what did I type ,nure no dont look that word up lol.Now dont forget to be curious ask questions your a represenative.You can do it with help especially now you know where to look.