The importance of just being there

I was very moved by an e-mail from Art P., from which I quote below:

You know, I suppose I am lucky because my father just died two years ago on his birthday at 82. But then, as he was a Neurosurgeon, I was never really a priority in his life due to the fact that there was always someone more important who needed their life to be saved. That's just the way it was growing up. He did apologize, however, for not being there for his family a week before he passed and I guess this comforts me, knowing that at least he was cognizant of what had happened during his life, but it seems little compensation to a lonely little boy. Would have rather had the time to get to know him better because, as it turns out, he was a very interesting man. But, if nothing else, my experience has certainly helped to set in stone my priorities for my own family. He told me that, "No one ever writes on their gravestone 'I wish I had spent more time at work.'" Something he learned from his Oncologist, far too late.

Over the last few years, I have looked back on the amount of time I have spent on my kids and sometimes wondered if it would have been in their best interest for me to focus more of my attention on getting ahead so that I could do a better job of providing for them. But Art is right. The time you give just being there for them, to talk to them and help them grow, is probably the best thing you can do for them. And I doubt my kids will ever say "Why didn't you spend less time with me?"