We've moved

Fathers After 40 can now be found here.

Can we help this expectant father?

I got a post on a recent topic that I felt deserved a post of its own. Here it is:

On our 20th anniversary, my wife and I found out she was pregnant. I am 46 she is 45. We have a 16 year old daughter and a 13 year old son. We both are scared about being older parents and need help.

That must have been quite the anniversary surprise! My parents went through that as well - my mother and father were in their 40s when my brother and I came along, and had already raised three kids. I was still in college when my mother retired at 65. There were some advantages of being the late arrival, particularly in terms of stability. Most of my older siblings moved frequently in their youths as my dad went from job to job, while I spent my entire childhood in one neighborhood.

But I recognize as well that for the parents there are also significant downsides. I guess the key question is - what about being an older parent scares you?

Anyone else with thoughts?